Lost: 30 lb. mirror

Mirror, mirror on the wall...where the heck are you? Last year, I hung a single shelf in my dining room thinking it would be a great knick-knack shelf and look even better with my huge, sentimentally meaningful mirror over it. Guess what? It's a year later and I can't find my mirror. The last time I saw it, it was propped up against the wall in the front hallway close to two years ago. Well, today I finally finished putting my Christmas decorations up (yes, the world's biggest Christmas nut was a little slow on the uptake this year) and am kicking myself for not being able to find that mirror. That shelf looks so stupid no matter how many lights I put on it. But the bigger grievance: How do you lose a 30-lb. mirror? My first theory was that it slipped unnoticed into the black hole that plagues my life, but more recently I've begun to suspect the person who means more to me than Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers. It pains me to say it, but I think Aubrey is trying to cover up for something. I bet he broke it and threw it out and just doesn't want to tell me. I don't know why he's so afraid to 'fess up. This isn't the first thing he's broken. Please, I'm on my second set of drinking glasses since our wedding and will soon be on my second set of dishes. But I'm telling you that nothing has aggravated me more than that ridiculous (but much beloved) mirror. This has turned into more than a game of hide and go seek. This has become a family quest. I will not stop until it's found. The Mystery of the Really Heavy Mirror will haunt me until the day I die. Aubrey, do you even read this blog? WHERE IS MY MIRROR? AHHHH!!!!!!!!